


The World Still Spins

by passionate_fruit



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Gen, Sad, The Major Character Death is Jason's Canon Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-24 05:12:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15623301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/passionate_fruit/pseuds/passionate_fruit
Summary: Jason Todd was nothing. A poor, dirty street boy. Nothing. Until, one day, he became something. Loved, accepted, a hero. Something. Someone. And nothing would take that away from him.





	The World Still Spins

It wasn’t like he hadn’t thought about it before. He had known, from a very young age, that that’s how the world worked. The world spins. Through all of the deaths, all of the wars, the attacks, the villains, the heroes. It wouldn’t stop for anything short of being blown into oblivion. 

In the big, grand scheme of things, Jason Todd was nothing.

No one would lose any sleep over the small, young, lonely, dirty kid. In fact, some people might even be glad to find out that they no longer had to deal with him. But knowing that didn’t hurt. Even he had, at times, wondered if it would be easier to give up and die.

And then he had met Batman.

Not to say that meeting Batman had solved all of his problems. It really hadn’t. But suddenly, he didn’t have to wonder where his next meal would come from. He was learning to help the world in a way he could agree with; beating people up. Which also helped him to deal with his anger.

He got to go to school and learn, plus access to Bruce’s enormous library, and the internet. He had learned more in a month than he had in his whole life, without people warily watching him as if he was going to ruin the already beat up books in the one small library he had gone to before he had a place to live.

He got running water, clean clothes, and nearly whatever he wanted thanks to Bruce’s money. He had people who _cared_ about him, which, as much as he hated to admit it, felt good.

But he still had a lot to learn about crime-fighting, with a constantly disappointed mentor and a legacy to live up to. He had to follow in the footsteps of someone who was practically perfect.

Jason couldn’t live up to that. But maybe he could be better in different ways. He wouldn’t let Dick Grayson beat him. It would be hard, but undoubtedly a nice change from where he used to be.

So he trained. For months on end. He trained and he studied and he enjoyed it. He never let anything stop him. There were months that he’d never stop, and he’d feel his own disappointment burning up his insides. Then there were days when he’d feel himself smile, and after what he’s been through? It felt amazing. 

Then, finally, it happened. He went out for his first night as Robin. He could feel everything paying off. He made mistakes, sure, but everything worked out. His hard work was paying off. The world spun and he was going right along with it, bouncing from rooftop to rooftop with Batman.

\- - - - -

“--street rat--”

“--publicity stunt--”

“--charity case--”

The world was spelling out one common theme: Jason didn’t belong.

Jason rolled his eyes.

“--dirty--”

“--disgusting--”

“--rotten--”

The voices whispered behind his back, terrible words tainting the beautiful faces of Gotham’s richest.

Jason frowned slowly.

During his first few months, galas had cut Jason to his core. Endless whispers had found themselves carving into his skin, little splinters of despair lodged into his side. 

Bruce, his hair messy and his voice loud in his disguise, reached down to ruffle Jason’s hair. Jason rolled his eyes again.

Then suddenly, there was the sound of crashing, people screaming.

Bruce and Jason made eye contact before they took off in the crowd of people, Bruce lightly holding Jason’s arm. At least six men in funky suit colors held guns. They appeared to be pretty normal, however. None of their colors schemes screamed “major villain”. 

Jason smirked, and Bruce gave him a look that said, “don’t”.

Then suddenly Bruce stopped. The crowd around them was gone, people shoving to get through rapidly closing doors as the armed men grabbed onto scared civilians. There were hands on Bruce too.

A crooked grin and wild eyes aimed towards Bruce, and Bruce kept character. Fear became evident on Bruce’s face. Jason managed to wrangle himself away and no one seemed to care.

Under the table, through the vents, out in the hallway, run to the study. Jason had to tread carefully away from any other afraid passerby who had managed to escape, but that was the _easy_ part. Past the secret passageway, down the stairs, to the computer. Jason turned the volume up on the security cameras as he changed, but nothing particularly exciting happened. However, the goons had increased in numbers, and they waved their guns around like they had nothing to lose. Bruce sat alone in the center of the room, very closely guarded and very trapped. Jason chuckled.

Robin flew out of another of the batcave’s secret entrances, around the manor, hiding under window sills just in case. Then, finally, up the side of a very fancy looking pillar and crashing down through a window. Bruce would be a tiny bit mad at the window being broken, but Jason didn’t care.

Robin took down the two nearest goons without a word. The entire room held its breath. Then twelve more goons rushed towards him, guns being fired without being aimed. Guests ducked as they resumed running out the now unblocked door.

Oh. These goons didn’t seem very smart. Robin grinned.

Not even ten minutes later, Bruce gave a subtle grin as the police came into the room and pulled the brightly colored villains away.

“--amazing--”

“--hero--” 

“--so cool--”

Words whispered behind him as he gave a brief retelling to the police. A few policeman gave a thumbs up as he left through his hole in the window.

A few hours passed. Bruce -and Alfred- chastised him for the window. But ultimately… 

“...fourteen men in about eight minutes. Add on the unnecessary civilian endangerment with the broken glass and flyaway bullets…” Bruce gave a stern look directly into Jason’s uncovered eyes, “no one was hurt.”

Jason nodded. Bruce’s eyes softened. Jason didn’t know what to make of that until--

“Nice work.” Bruce gave a smile, a real one. Small, sure, but it seemed to fill Jason up, empty space becoming full of acceptance. Everywhere the gala had torn him down was gone.

It was true that Jason didn’t belong at the galas. But he belonged here, in the batcave, with Bruce. Jason smiled back.

\- - - - -

_He’s coming, he’s coming, he’s coming._ He tried to say it out loud to reassure himself, but his lungs were burning and his throat felt like it had been ripped out. _He’s coming._ He has to be coming. Any second now, Batman would burst through the door. And he would run up to Jason and maybe look a little disappointed at first but only because he cared, and then he would carefully lift him up and take him home. And it would hurt, but it would be okay because he’d be safe. 

And Bruce would help him, and forget that he should’ve been angry that Jason disobeyed him. Because what bigger punishment could there be than getting beaten up by the Joker?

It would take awhile for him to get better, but it wouldn’t matter because he’d be safe, and loved, and cared for.

Jason stared at the door until his eyes couldn’t focus anymore. Batman was coming for him because he mattered. Because he had a purpose. Because he was Jason Todd, someone that Bruce had willingly let into his life. Someone who was important not just because he was Robin, but because he had people who knew he existed, and cared that he was there.

_He’s coming._ Jason thought. Because he knew Batman was. Jason knew it. So he waited.

And waited.

And waited.

_Tick._

He tore his eyes away from the door.

_Tick._

...No.

_Tick._

He blinked his eyes until they could focus again.

_Tick._

He found himself staring at a large red seven.

_Tick._

Counting down.

_Tick._

Batman was coming.

_Tick._

He had to be.

_Tick._

_Tick._

_Tick._

He wouldn’t leave Jason here, would he?

_Boom._

\- - - - -

Jason woke up a second later.

He could feel the fire on his arms, his broken body burning. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t breathe, _he couldn’t breathe--!_

But he wasn’t in his bed, or even a medical cot from what he could tell. Everything was black, and smelled like wood, earth, and decay.

He wondered if he could speak if he tried. He couldn’t before, but his lungs felt stronger somehow.

“Batman?” his voice was quiet, hoarse and barely recognisable, but he tried again.

“Batman?” he said, trying to be louder, but his throat was so dry that his voice cracked. “Batman?!” 

His arms flailed a little bit, but didn’t get too far. Wherever he was, it was small. It felt small and skinny and the top was barely tall enough to fit him. It almost felt like a--

“Bruce?!” he called out, because he couldn’t care less about secret identities at the moment. He didn’t feel like Robin anymore. “Bruce?!” His hands grasped and tore at the wood above him.

How could he move his arms? He remembered them, painfully numb in the warehouse, then being burnt away in a horrible explosion he was right at the center of. 

Out of the corner of his eye, despite it being pitch black, large red numbers playfully danced. 

Counting _down_ , one at a time, at an agonizingly slow pace that was moving all too fast.

_Boom._

Pain, light, explosion, heat, burning, dying, pushing, shoving, falling, gone, gone, gone.

His hands screamed in pain as he ripped the wood apart, until dirt was rushing in through the hole he had created. Batman hadn’t saved him, but he still screamed Bruce’s name as he ripped the box-- his _coffin_ \-- to shreds.

Dust and dirt filled his lungs as he clawed his way out of the dirt, his hands aching, his chest gasping, he went up, up, _up_ , as the taunting numbers replayed in his mind. Down, down, down, boom! Down, down, down, _can’t breathe, can’t move_ , boom, heat, bright, blinding, _can’t see, can’t remember_ , screaming, stopping, _too late, Batman was too late--_

Jason could barely remember his own name by the time he made it to the surface, his lungs pulling in the cold air. Rain was pouring over body as he pulled himself away from his…

“Bruce!” he was screaming hoarsely. He was already soaking wet, and couldn’t tell if it was only from the rain or if he was actually crying. His hands were aching painfully, but he barely felt it. His entire body felt exhausted, but he kept going. Bruce didn’t save him, but he was going back. 

Phantom pains echoed over his entire body as his eyes blurred. The world spun dangerously below him, but Jason tried to keep up. He had already lost once, but this time he refused to be left behind.

He was Jason Todd, and he meant something.

\- - - - -

It didn’t really _surprise_ him. Yet there was still a part of him that didn’t expect it. In the grand scheme of things, nothing had changed. He was still Jason Todd, and the world could go on without him. And so could Bruce and Alfred. So could anyone who had met him. Life could go on without him. But to know that, _to see it,_ hurt.

Batman jumped over the rooftops.

Robin followed behind him.

Except it _wasn’t_ Robin. It _couldn’t_ be Robin. Because _Jason_ was Robin, and _Jason_ was right here.

Black hair, black cape, as dark as it was the night that he had woken up. Black, like Batman. Like Gotham. Like death. His chest tightened.

Green, like the grass and the leaves, green sleeves, green leggings. Green like life, the colors he never really appreciated, growing up in such a dark and lonely place. He missed it.

Yellow, the cape’s interior flashing brightly against the night. The opposite of Batman, the light. Something Jason was not. Jason was in the dark. Batman passed by, not even seeing him.

Red. _Red._ The color of Robin’s tunic, a symbol of hope. Jason cringed.The color of Joker’s lips, laughter slipping through the permanent, off putting grin. The crowbar as it beat him down. Blood, coming from his mouth, body, _everywhere._ Bright red numbers counting down.

Hope, love, trust. That’s what it had meant to him.

Anger, destruction, death. That was all that came to mind now. 

He had been left behind, forgotten and lost. Batman didn’t care. Jason wanted to scream. 

Life didn’t want him. Death wouldn’t take him either. Red filled his vision.

Blood, counting down, being _let_ down, giving up. Beaten, fighting, crowbars and numbers. His hands ached as they were rubbed raw after pulling himself out of his own coffin, out of his own grave. Wayne Manor stood just as high and menacing as it had the first time he had come. He was ripped away from his home, from his _family._ Everything had been taken down, stripped away, until the only thing left was anger, vengeance, and _red._

A few months later, Joker’s red lips laughed. Jason cocked his gun. He was angry. But the world had left him behind. Batman was black, smoky, hidden. Dodging the problem. Jason didn’t go after the Joker. He fired his gun.

_Tick._

_Tick._

_Tick._

_Boom!_ The bodies of criminals fell down.

Batman would have to see him now. Jason was dying Gotham blood red, and he wasn’t going to stop until nothing was left. Batman would realize his mistakes, and Batman was going to get revenge on the Joker.

After all, the world wasn’t going to stop. He had known that from a very young age. Heroes, villains, life, death. No one was losing any sleep over the small, dirty street boy. And knowing that hurt. But Jason would guarantee that this time, he wouldn’t be the one giving up. This time, he wouldn’t be the one dying. 

In the big, grand scheme of things, Jason would be something.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure about the way Jason dies and is resurrected. The way I wrote it might not match up with any version of canon, so whoops, sorry! I love Jason but I have no real source of comics so I haven't actually read anything that wasn't out of context. If you have any good places to read comics online I'd love to know!!
> 
> On another note, please comment! I'm not sure how I feel about this story and would love to hear your opinions!!!


End file.
